jueves, 5 de noviembre de 2015

FEELINGS: GETTING A JOB, GETTING INDEPENDENCE

Yesterday (Wednesday 4/11/15) I got a phone call from Grupo Levanter about a position as a Personal Interpreter… I’m a university graduated, so that meant that I was supposed to be working as an industrial engineering in any area of my career. But since we are in Honduras, that’d be too much to ask for.

I speak English, that’s one my many skills, and, and, not the way I dreamt it, but I’d like to make money out of something I like. In my previous post I wrote that I dreamed once of being a interpreter at the UN. Maybe this might be the star of something. I know I need to practice more and improve my English, since the interpretation at the UN is simultaneous, that means some president or ambassador speaks and the interpreter translates at the same time. I haven’t reached there yet.

I liked being a teacher at a university, I taught things I know and love: Hygiene and Industrial Safety and English. I don’t like that much an office schedule, don’t like not being allow to be creative, have initiative, and not having a voice of opinion. I was free to give the class as I thought it should be held, I wasn’t give any structure, I didn’t even have a book which the students and I could follow and based the class on.

In the phone interview I was told about the two job schedule they have for full time job, one is from 9am to 7pm, the other is from 8am to 5:30pm, I chose the second one. In this force vacations I’ve been hitting bed really early in the morning, so that means I wake up way past noon. I have to reprogram myself in order to fit the job schedule. The good thing it’d be that I wouldn’t work on the weekends.

I have to get this opportunity, my mind and emotions can’t handle anymore to be an unemployed. I feel like that I’m being wasted and I waste all that I have and been given. It’s time to be the grown up I turned since I left my teens years. It is frightening to be an adult, to be independent, to have responsibilities, but I want them, I know I can (learn to) handle them, to be comfortable with them and I definitely will hate them sometimes, but it’s part of life…

I’ve been yelling that I want to be independent since many years ago and seems like I haven’t been so push forward to go and get it. It’s time, it’s about time, the time is now. I will have hits and defeats, and I have to not to allow that confuse my mind and emotions. The hits lift your ego (mine) and the defeats put you down (in my case really down). I’m a bipolar and a depressive woman, I tend to stay in the depressive mood for too much.

Can’t keep on living like that. Can’t afford it anymore!! The world it not that gray, and I know it’s that pink either. It has a rainbow of shades that I have to learn to manage and most importantly I have to enjoy the joy of being alive and breathing and thinking and dreaming. I’m a dreamer that now has to be a maker. Have to make my dreams and plans come true.

Yeap! I feel better already. I have lift up my mood. I’m content.

Until the next post!
- Warrior Princess.